@hardlydead

[outerfringe]

[One day David simply stops appearing by the fire with the rest of them, and Jeff does his very best to be relieved for him. There are only two real possible reasons for that, right? Either he'd actually died for real, or he'd managed to find a way back home- and either way, it meant that he was out of this place. Jeff tries to be happy for him, and for the most part, he is.

He doesn't think about David at all the first day after he wakes up on the cold floor of the Ormond resort, back stiff and jacket crusted with frost. Instead he's too busy finding his way back to town, organizing arrangements to make it home. His apartment key no longer works, he recognizes none of his neighbors, but his bank account was still somehow in alright standing.

Jeff finds a new place. He does not find a new dog.

He feels weird about creating a Facebook account just to check for David, but he does it anyway. When that comes up fruitless, he thinks a lot about the conversations the two of them had while tucked close together in the dark. Wonders if David would even want to be found by someone like him, to be faced with a reminder of the time they'd spent doing everything they could to simply survive.

Jeff tries to paint but can't seem to pull himself out of severe blacks and reds. Tries to catch up on the music he'd missed from the bands he'd loved but it fails to soothe him the way it had before. He considers a therapist, and then decides that he'd be locked away the second he was candid enough for someone to actually help him.

So he packs some things, books a flight. Finds himself at his fifth seedy pub in three days without much hope - except this time when he says he's looking for David King, the big guy by the bar makes a point of sizing him up. Jeff sets his shoulders, frowns and promises that he's an old friend, but it doesn't seem to affect much the scowl on the guy's face. He says something (that Jeff completely misses, he can barely understand a goddamn thing when people here are drunk and loud), but seems to indicate for him to wait.

Which he does. He parks on a stool with a drink, assumes his most unapproachable aura, and waits. He doesn't know who he's expecting to appear, but it's not David.

There's not a chance it would actually be that simple.]

Comments

[hardlydead]

[ he purses his lips, swallowing down the urge to argue because it wouldn't do anything except make them both feel like shit, and nods his head. ]

[ maybe a shift in subject? would that be good or would it just be a distraction? david nudges jeff again, this time leaning more of his weight into it. ]

Still can't believe you came and found me.

[outerfringe]

[Part of him relaxes when David doesn't argue, and the way he nudges him back is almost apologetic. Fuck, if this isn't weird. He still feels like he's in a bit of a fugue state, like this can't possibly be real.

He's looking forward to seeing David in the actual sunlight.]

Said I would.

[He takes a deep, bracing breath.]

I brought Settlers of Catan.

[He doesn't realize it's not a two player game, but he's heard a lot about it, and he'd said once he'd bring games- either a firm commitment to the bit, or just grasping onto whatever straws he can to feel like this is a normal situation.]

[hardlydead]

[ something about that catches david so off-guard that what comes out of him is a sudden, loud bark of a laugh. ]

I don't know what that is.

[outerfringe]

[God, did that laugh just make him blush? What the hell is wrong with him? He's extremely grateful that it's dark and cold.]

Board game.

[hardlydead]

A board game.

[ his tone is teasing, but that tugs loose a completely buried and forgotten memory and his awful smirk returns when he looks at jeff. ]

So you're inviting yourself to my place, is it?

[outerfringe]

[Buried maybe for David, but they're the exact sorts of memories that Jeff had clung desperately to between trials.

He waves the smirk off.]

Nah, man, I don't know-

[He has no idea what's going on in David's life. Doesn't know what, or who, might be at 'home' waiting for him.]

Just felt like I should bring a gift.

[hardlydead]

[ it might not be humanly possible for a person to listen less to somebody else than david in that moment. the second he gets a whiff of jeff trying to brush it off, he immediately turns in a seemingly random direction and starts walking with a significantly less meandering gait than the moment before. ]

C'mon. It's about half an hour's walk this way.

[outerfringe]

Uh-

[Jeff follows, because he's in an unfamiliar city and also probably he'd follow David into hell right now, but he's clearly thrown off.]

It's still in the hotel, man.

[hardlydead]

Oh.

[ he stops in his tracks and turns to look at jeff and all the stuff he's not carrying. right. carrying a game around on the chance he'd find david, and that he'd invite him back would be a crazy thing to do. ]

[ he laughs, genuinely. what an idiot he is. ]

Yeah. Obviously.

[outerfringe]

[Jeff stares at him, bewildered and a little overwhelmed by the situation at large, before he presses his hand to his face and laughs.]

It's not far. We could, uh. Swing by and pick it up.

[hardlydead]

Yeah?

[ wait was that too excited? he clears his throat and nods. gestures for jeff to lead the way. ]

Sure. Let's go.

[outerfringe]

[Do either of them know how to play this game? Do either of them have literally anything in common with each other? Is it doomed to be an impossibly awkward night?

Jeff knocks David's arm with his elbow as he leads on.]

Hey. For real. You're a sight for sore eyes.

[hardlydead]

[ that heat on his face is definitely just the booze finally starting to hit right? right. david bows his head with a small smile and nudges jeff back. ]

You too.

[outerfringe]

M'I gonna get to meet your dog when we go to your place?

[A sidelong glance. Challenging. He doubts David even remembers that conversation, but whatever.]

[hardlydead]

Didn't get one yet.

[ that one he remembers, it was one that lingered with thoughts of a different life. better things for both of them. cute little fantasies that kept him going in the fog, weighed him down once he was out. ]

Wasn't gonna commit 'til I knew when you were gonna show your mug.

[outerfringe]

[Jeff grunts in acknowledgment.]

I don't date guys without pets. Shows a lack of commitment.

[Okay yeah he's feeling the alcohol for sure.]

[hardlydead]

[ he laughs, not even registering how forward that is for jeff. ]

Maybe you can help me find the right one.

[outerfringe]

[It feels especially stupid, considering that they're both certainly working through a mountain of unprocessed trauma



but at least they had shots.]

Alright, yeah. Sign me up.

[It occurs to him that he's - well, kind of desperate to touch him. Not sexually, just generally, and the next little arm bump is disguised as an accident.]

[hardlydead]

[ david's right there with him. actually being around jeff has him aching for the stupidest little things like a hand on his back or just their thighs touching when they sat next to eachother. ]

[ nudges will do for now, and david bumps jeff back with a snort. ]

I've never had a pet, dunno what to even look for.

[ like. dog??? big dog??? can he just walk into a shelter and say that? ]

[outerfringe]

Could start small. Get a gerbil or something.

[He's trying to picture David with a gerbil and it's weirdly fucking cute.]

I keep thinking about a cat.

[It just doesn't feel okay to adopt another dog. Not yet.]

[hardlydead]

[ he scoffs, but he used to know a girl who kept rats and she wouldn't shut up about how great they were. maybe he could-- ]

[ no. nope. no rats, no birds. there's a question nobody asked answered. ]

A cat?

[ actually he can see it. jeff with a cat curled up in his lap while he plays a game, giving it little scritches behind the ears and shit. it's honestly almost offensively cute. ]

[ he tilts his head in thought. ]

I can see it.

[outerfringe]

Yeah? Maybe a deaf one. Won't have to worry about offending it with my music.

[He glances at David, expression deadpan, before it cracks up into silent laughter. He's too big a guy to be this affected by that much alcohol, right? Except he's barely drank at all since he's been back, and the adrenaline from finding David at all already has him buzzing.

He points ahead, indicating a cluster of buildings.]

Couple blocks that way.

[hardlydead]

[ fucking hell he missed that, just seeing jeff smile and laugh warms him and david smiles, full of affection just from looking at him. ]

[ 'couple of blocks' is immediately translated as a couple of blocks until he can kiss that face. he's too focused on that to even judge jeff for calling them 'blocks'. ]

And I'd tell your cat I'm jealous, but it wouldn't be able to hear me.

[outerfringe]

[Jeff is fully and tipsily unwilling to acknowledge how completely nonsensical that unit of measurement here.]

What an ass.

[Said with that same good humor, but his hands flex a bit uncomfortably in his pockets.]

Hey, man, uh-

[He clears his throat, awkward.]

Worried I might, uh. Unravel a little bit. When we're alone. It's cool if you wanna just give me a minute when we get there.

[Jeff is fairly sure he's going to cry, and while it's been firmly established that David still cares about him, he's still not going to assume he wants to be there for that.

And if nothing else, the pressure building up this time feels like relief, gratitude, instead of despair.]

[hardlydead]

[ david doesn't quite get what jeff means by 'unravel,' but he nods anyway. if he needs a moment to himself then he can have it, but that doesn't sound like that's what he's getting at. ]

Yeah-- Yeah, sure.

[ he bumps jeff with his shoulder. ]

We'll see.